The very phrase strikes terror in my heart. I hate car problems. Despise, abhor, abominate, detest, and a zillion other thesaurus entries. Hate, hate, hate! I mean, seriously, are we clear on this?
Yet, none of us who drive are immune to them.
And — my car is still actually running. I will be able to drive it to the car place in the morning. I will be able to sit in comfort while they look at it, or avail myself of their lovely shuttle service home. I even have the funds to pay for almost any repair (and boy do I send up a prayer in gratitude for that fact)!
Still, the thought of repairs drags me down, makes me want a long nap. Makes me want to sleep through the snooze bar and ignore the whole world. Too many years of NOT being able to pay for a big repair…. of waiting around greasy, smelly too hot, too cold hard chaired, or no chaired, repair shops.
And, remember when sitting at the mechanic’s meant you were out of touch? I have the choice of my Kindle, my cellphone, my netbook, my knitting… you get the picture. They have complimentary coffee and varied snack machines. Wireless, for Pete’s sake. I need to do some serious attitude adjustment about this. But in the mean time, the entire mess just makes me exhausted.
From the Osho Zen Tarot website on “Exhaustion”:
A man who lives through conscience becomes hard. A man who lives through
consciousness remains soft. Why?–because a man who has some ideas about how to
live, naturally becomes hard. He has continuously to carry his character around
himself. That character is like an armor; his protection, his security; his
whole life is invested in that character. And he always reacts to situations
through the character, not directly. If you ask him a question, his answer is
ready-made. That is the sign of a hard person–he is dull, stupid, mechanical.
He may be a good computer, but he is not a man. You do something and he reacts
in a well- established way. His reaction is predictable; he is a robot. The real
man acts spontaneously. If you ask him a question, your question gets a
response, not a reaction. He opens his heart to your question, exposes himself
to your question, responds to it…. Osho Take it Easy, Volume 1 Chapter 13 Commentary: This is the portrait of one whose whole life energy has been depleted in his
efforts to keep fueling the enormous and ridiculous machine of self-importance
and productivity. He has been so busy “keeping it all together” and “making sure
everything runs smoothly”, that he has forgotten to really rest. No doubt he
can’t allow himself to be playful. To abandon his duty for a trip to the beach
could mean the whole structure might come tumbling down. The message of this
card is not just about being a workaholic, though. It is about all the ways in
which we set up safe but unnatural routines for ourselves and, by doing so, keep
the chaotic and spontaneous away from our doors. Life isn’t a business to be
managed, it’s a mystery to be lived. It’s time to tear up the time-card, break
out of the factory, and take a little trip into the uncharted. Your work can
flow more smoothly from a relaxed state of mind.